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如何成為職場(chǎng)中最有吸引力的人(2)
4.解決他人之間的沖突和爭(zhēng)端
In a recent executive coaching survey, CEOs mentioned "conflict-management skills" as their top priority. Being able to help others resolve disputes and conflicting agendas is not just an asset in the C-suite, where leaders have to manage the expectations of a multitude of stakeholders. Even among friends, those who can keep a cool head and balance reason and emotion when arguments threaten to spiral into conflict and hostility, have the respect and admiration of their peers.
在最新的主管指導(dǎo)調(diào)查中，總裁把“矛盾解決能力”放在了首位。有能力幫助其他人解決爭(zhēng)端和沖突的日程表不僅僅是在最高管理層中有用，領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者要協(xié)調(diào)股東們的需求。甚至在朋友之間，那些在爭(zhēng)議將要發(fā)展成矛盾和敵意的時(shí)候仍可以保持冷靜，平衡理智和情感的人，能得到同伴的尊敬和敬仰。
5. Build relationships and connect with people.
5.和他人建立人際關(guān)系
Whether we are individual contributors, startup entrepreneurs or corporate leaders, we need the help of others to accomplish our goals. Being an interesting person helps in building and managing relationships, but the reverse is also true.
不管是個(gè)體工作者，創(chuàng)業(yè)企業(yè)家還是公司領(lǐng)導(dǎo)，我們都需要?jiǎng)e人的幫助來(lái)完成目標(biāo)。成為一個(gè)有吸引力的人能幫助我們建立、管理人際關(guān)系，反過(guò)來(lái)也一樣。
If we actively engage others, by, for example, inviting someone to lunch, involving a co-worker in a project, asking for a favor, offering support, or sincerely inquiring how someone is doing, we not only become visible, we become relevant. That's the foundation of mutually gratifying relationships. Make it a goal to communicate authentically with others and become more interesting to them in the process.
如果我們積極和他人交往，比如邀請(qǐng)別人一起共進(jìn)午餐，和同事在同個(gè)項(xiàng)目中一起工作，請(qǐng)求幫助，提供支持，或是真誠(chéng)地問(wèn)問(wèn)別人在干什么，我們不僅僅會(huì)更有存在感，同樣會(huì)和他們有所關(guān)聯(lián)。這是建立令人滿(mǎn)意的人際關(guān)系的基礎(chǔ)。努力真誠(chéng)與人交往，在過(guò)程中變得更有吸引力。
6. Engage in active listening.
6.積極傾聽(tīng)
Aside from the fact that engaged listening makes us better informed about people and issues, giving someone our full and undivided attention can have a profound effect on their perception of us. Listening attentively is "giving" rather than "taking." Contrast this with the person who primarily keeps the focus on themselves and the difference becomes crystal clear.
積極傾聽(tīng)除了能讓我們更好地了解人和事物，全神貫注傾聽(tīng)某人能改觀我們?cè)谒麄冃闹械挠∠�。積極傾聽(tīng)更多的是“給予”而不是“得到”。和這相對(duì)立的是那些把關(guān)注點(diǎn)首先放在自己身上的人。這其中差別十分明顯。
When we're listened to, we matter. Those who do most of the talking believe they matter. We become more interesting when we listen to others.
當(dāng)別人傾聽(tīng)我們的時(shí)候，我們是最重要的。大部分講話(huà)的人認(rèn)為他們是最重要的。如果我們能做到傾聽(tīng)他人，我們會(huì)變得具有吸引力。
7. Live life and share experiences.
7.享受生命，分享經(jīng)歷
Our experiences and what we choose to share are what make others take an interest in us. People often live vicariously through the adventures of their more socially active peers. It doesn't have to be running with the bulls in Barcelona — we easily become a little more interesting when we discuss experiences of enjoying a meal at an exotic new restaurant, learning a challenging skill like waterskiing or attending opening night at the museum.
我們選擇分享的經(jīng)歷和其他內(nèi)容是能讓人感興趣的東西。人們通常對(duì)社交中更為活躍的同伴的冒險(xiǎn)經(jīng)歷感同身受。用不著在巴塞羅那參加過(guò)奔牛節(jié)——我們只要談一談關(guān)于在一家異國(guó)風(fēng)味的新餐廳的享受過(guò)的美食，學(xué)習(xí)像滑水撬這樣的技巧，或者是參加博物館的開(kāi)放夜的經(jīng)歷，就能很容易讓自己變得更吸引力。
Standing out in a positive way has wide-ranging benefits. These rules are merely a starting point as we manage ourselves to become the most interesting person in the world.
積極生活能帶來(lái)很多好處。要想變成世界上最具吸引力的人，這些建議只是一個(gè)開(kāi)始。
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